Health & Fitness

Post as you see fit
User avatar
Ekona
Posts: 16636
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 8:24 pm
Tag: Official member of the RB Anti Facist Party est. 2009
Location: Braintree, innit

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Ekona » Thu Dec 10, 2015 3:32 pm

I don't feel comfortable having this conversation...
"Chav kids are like sand people. They're easily startled but they'll be back, and in greater numbers."

User avatar
Polito45
Posts: 1748
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2012 2:17 pm
Tag: Hasn't realised that there are custom wanks yet
Location: Looking up a camel's hole.

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Polito45 » Thu Dec 10, 2015 5:31 pm

I agree.
Even after having had a surgical instrument rammed down my throat and another one stuck up my hole,
I draw the line at analysing Helios's apparent fascination with whether he should give himself a hard on or not before sticking things in his penis. :evil:
"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." — Aristotle

User avatar
Helios
Posts: 4802
Joined: Wed Mar 21, 2007 9:20 pm
Location: London
Contact:

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Helios » Thu Dec 10, 2015 6:29 pm

Polito45 wrote:Having said that... I imagine it would be easier flaccid as a penis engorged with blood
would constrict the pee pee tube enabling the shooting, under pressure, of spunk across a room or car park.

Makes sense.
Image

Mr.Clark
Posts: 4435
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2007 8:57 am

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Mr.Clark » Thu Dec 10, 2015 8:00 pm

Polito45 wrote:Even after having had a surgical instrument rammed down my throat and another one stuck up my hole,

Did they do a high-five at the base of your lungs?

"Hey, I'm looking at you, looking at me looking at you..."

User avatar
Polito45
Posts: 1748
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2012 2:17 pm
Tag: Hasn't realised that there are custom wanks yet
Location: Looking up a camel's hole.

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Polito45 » Thu Dec 10, 2015 9:57 pm

:mrgreen:

Thankfully it's medically unethical to perform both procedures at the same time.
There's a fear that it might create some kind of a wormhole in the space time continuum.
In my case it would probably be a black hole as the medical device shorted out. :o
"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." — Aristotle

Jezreel

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Jezreel » Thu Dec 10, 2015 9:59 pm

5 stone 10 lbs as of today. Much slower with all the Christmas parties etc. Sticking with it in-between the festivities though so it's not getting worse lol. 2 more lbs and I'm under 21 stone for the first time in years.

User avatar
Ekona
Posts: 16636
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 8:24 pm
Tag: Official member of the RB Anti Facist Party est. 2009
Location: Braintree, innit

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Ekona » Thu Dec 10, 2015 10:56 pm

Dude, that's incredible work. Much respect 8)
"Chav kids are like sand people. They're easily startled but they'll be back, and in greater numbers."

Jezreel

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Jezreel » Thu Dec 10, 2015 11:59 pm

Moar skinny required. Thanks man.

User avatar
Tinlad
Tech Moderator
Posts: 3345
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 4:54 pm
Tag: Dog food scientist.
Location: Leeds
Contact:

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Tinlad » Fri Dec 11, 2015 9:45 am

That's about half an average person that you aren't carrying around any more. That's awesome. 8)

Mr.Clark
Posts: 4435
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2007 8:57 am

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Mr.Clark » Fri Dec 11, 2015 6:03 pm

Nice :)

I've just re-started Krav Maga.

So much pain... :?

User avatar
MrPeg
Posts: 1850
Joined: Sat Jul 05, 2008 3:21 pm
Tag: Special

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby MrPeg » Sat Dec 12, 2015 12:18 am

Big congrats on the belly reduction!! You've shat out about Half a person there!
Image

User avatar
Sam
Posts: 4956
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2007 8:41 pm
Tag: Hasn't realised that there are custom ranks yet
Location: Northern Ireland

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Sam » Tue Jan 05, 2016 10:40 am

Saturday night, couldn't sleep, horrendous heartburn and felt like I was going to be sick, nearly threw up a few times but nothing came of it.

For the past 3 and a bit days it's felt like someones punched me in the gut and if I move too quickly it feels like I've been stabbed in the stomach. Had the shits about a half dozen times a day, haven't got any fucking sleep either apart from 3 hours yesterday and maybe a couple of 15 minute naps last night, when the vomiting kept coming and coming. Pain in the lower back too.

Went into work anyway but lasted about 2 hours yesterday and went home.

What's making it worse is all the nurses at work have come down with bad colds/chests and I got it, so everytime I cough I'm nearly sick and sometimes am.

All I've had the past two days is water so when I was being sick it's all that horrible biley sick. Then this morning it was bile type stuff, then a bowlful of brown coloured stuff, followed by a pinky red one, which is worrying.

Got an appt at the GP in just over an hour and a half, and hope to fuck he doesn't send me up to hospital because I cannot be arsed with being an inpatient at my own work.

edit: When you have a case of V+D, make sure you try and hold the Diarrhea in and be sick first, it's not the best idea to have to put your head over the bowl after the shites.
:-)

User avatar
Ekona
Posts: 16636
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 8:24 pm
Tag: Official member of the RB Anti Facist Party est. 2009
Location: Braintree, innit

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Ekona » Tue Jan 05, 2016 1:38 pm

Excellent tip :lol:

Eaten anything dodgy?
"Chav kids are like sand people. They're easily startled but they'll be back, and in greater numbers."

User avatar
Sam
Posts: 4956
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2007 8:41 pm
Tag: Hasn't realised that there are custom ranks yet
Location: Northern Ireland

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Sam » Tue Jan 05, 2016 2:45 pm

Nah nothing dodgy else the g/f would be sick too. Or my mum.

Basically told me to keep drinking water and take paracetamol and if I'm still bad on Friday to go back and they might send me up to hospital.

Thinks it's gastroenteritis but I had it for 12 days before and it was nowhere near as bad as this...
:-)

User avatar
Polito45
Posts: 1748
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2012 2:17 pm
Tag: Hasn't realised that there are custom wanks yet
Location: Looking up a camel's hole.

Re: Health & Fitness

Postby Polito45 » Tue Jan 05, 2016 7:10 pm

You'll be grand. ;)
It's just the Irish/English crappy diet.

I diagnose:
Oesophagitis with a short segment of Barretts oesophagus.
(Acidic bile is coming up into your lower oesophagus irritating the skin there which is not designed by God to manage acidic bile. [bitch])
Evidence of GERD.
(The arsehole at the end of your oesophagus is a bit fucked.)
Gastritis and pangastritis antral and cardia predominant.
(No fucking idea)
Duodenitis.
(The thing that you have in your stomach reffered to above that I don't know what it is... you also have it here.)
Also, if you have blood in your stools you probably have a bleeding ulcer.

Prognosis: You're fucked. :|
"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." — Aristotle


Return to “The Lounge”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 21 guests

cron